When it comes to sex, especially anal sex, knowing how to prepare for anal preparation is everything. Without it, even the best intentions can lead to discomfort, stress, or injury—especially with anal play, which requires more care and understanding. Safe anal sex starts with proper prep. It will reduce discomfort, lowers infection risk, and sets you up for a more pleasurable experience.
The anus is one of the most sensitive erogenous zones. Like the vagina or penis, it responds well to the right touch—but only if done with care. We know anal can seem intimidating, so if you want to know how to prepare for prepare for anal sex, we’re breaking down everything you need to know in this anal sex for beginners guide. We will share anal sex tips and more! Think of it as an anal training kit.
What is Anal Play?
So what is anal play anyway? According to Planned Parenthood, it's defined as "penis-in-butt intercourse."
Just like we prep for vaginal sex, it makes total sense to do the same for anal play, right?
Based on the same Planned Parenthood article, the anus doesn't produce its own lubrication unlike the vagina, so stimulation and penetration will be harder to do. To avoid discomfort and injury, the best move you can do is to apply a lot of lube onto the area. This will help to prevent any unwanted tearing and have a smooth experience, no matter what position and technique you want to try out!
How to Prepare For Anal Sex?
We cannot stress this enough: prepping your body before sex—especially anal play—is essential. Before hitting it from the back, take your time and follow these steps (inspired by Self) for a smoother, stress-free experience, especially if you're new to anal:
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Decide on the type of anal play. Like vaginal sex, anal stimulation comes in many forms:
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Penis-in-anus
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Toy-in-anus
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Finger-in-anus
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Mouth-in-anus
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If you're new, start simple. Try inserting a finger to get your body used to the sensation. Don't rush in with a boldly built toy and learn how to use anal toys first. With a partner, light rimming can also help ease your body. If you're more experienced, adding a toy or penis can level things up.
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Use plenty of lube. The anus doesn't self-lubricate, so lube is essential. This is not just for comfort, but also to prevent tearing and reduce STI risk for safe anal play. Choose one that suits you and your partner’s needs, especially if you have sensitivities. There is no universal best lube for anal but we do have recommendations.
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Oil-based and silicone-based lubes are thick and long-lasting, but oil can break condoms, and silicone shouldn’t be used with silicone toys.
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Water-based lube is great for toy use but dries faster, so reapply as needed. Honey Play Box offers an excellent water-based lube in four sizes—perfect for travel or get the larger bottle if you need a little more for anal play. It truly is one of the best lube for anal toy play.
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Make sure your toys are anal-safe. It might sound obvious, but anal toys must be body-safe and non-porous—like silicone or glass—to prevent bacteria buildup. Anal sex for beginners can be intimidating, so you need to know how to use anal toys. FRENZY is a beginner-friendly, app-controlled anal toy. NOAH is another go-to waterproof butt plug and anal vibrator that’s easy to clean and fun to use.
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Use condoms. You can never be too careful. One of the best anal hygiene tips is to use condoms. It offers protection and is part of good anal hygiene and safe anal sex practice. Just make sure they’re compatible with your lube and that neither you nor your partner has sensitivities to the material. This is essential in your anal training kit.
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Expect a little mess. Yes, poop happens—and that’s normal! The anus is where waste exits, so a bit of mess is part of the deal. There is no need for shame. For more hygiene tips, check out Pleasure Educator Luna Matatas’ guide: 6 Ways to Have Better Anal Sex.
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Clean up as much as possible down there. One of the most common anal hygiene tips people follow is cleaning their backside before anal play. An enema is a safe and effective way to do this. The BULBY Auto Anal Douche Guide Kit makes it super easy—it's rechargeable, hands-free, and lets you control the water flow. Whether you’ve got time to prep or need a quick rinse, BULBY Anal Douche Guide helps you feel fresh and ready. Don’t skip this step in your anal care routine!
What if There's Not A lot Of Time to Prepare?
We get it—spontaneous booty calls happen! But that doesn’t mean you can’t feel confident and ready. Healthline has a quick anal care routine that can help.
Start by setting the mood. If things are heating up and you’ve got a moment, take a quick bathroom break. If time allows, a fast rinse with an enema can help you feel more confident. Need a guide? BULBY'S got you covered.
If you’re really short on time, one anal sex tips that we love are wet wipes! Give your backside a good wipe—especially around the anus—to freshen up. Let your partner know you didn’t have much time to prep. A quick heads-up builds trust and keeps things relaxed.
Anal sex for beginners can be scary, so going slow is key. It ensures safer anal sex and gives you space to explore beginner-friendly positions like:
Back It Up
If you are looking for an anal position that's beginner friendly, then try Back it Up. It focuses on shallow anal penetration, which is perfect because most of the nerves that deliver pleasure to your brain are located around the sphincter muscles. This way you get plenty of pleasure without needing to go in too deep or use a lot of force.
The Doggy
The classic “all-fours” position is a fun way to explore anal play. If you’ve tried it with vaginal sex, switching to anal can be a cool way to compare and see what you like best.
The Missionary
Anal can also be done in missionary! This is a good position for the person getting penetrated because they can relax on their back and it is easy to access whether you are going in with a toy, a strap on, or anything else!
What if There's More Time to Prepare?
If time’s on your side, it’s worth doing a full prep or investing in tools to make anal more comfortable and enjoyable. Following good anal hygiene tips and having a good anal training kit goes a long way. According to Healthline, here are some anal sex tips:
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Learn your body and toys. Understanding how the anus works can help you avoid discomfort and discover what feels good along with knowing how to use anal toys safely!
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Be patient! Use anal plugs or dilators to stretch slowly over time—starting small is key.
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Protect your bed. A waterproof sex throw saves your sheets from stains and stress. It's also convenient for easy clean up.
Do you need to shave or wax? Nope! It’s all personal preference. Body hair doesn’t affect anal play.
Should you orgasm first? Only if it helps you relax. It’s totally optional.
What if there’s poop? It happens! Clean up, communicate, and remember it’s natural. There is absolutely no need for shame.
What if there’s blood? Stop immediately and consult a healthcare provider. It’s always better to be safe than sorry.
Conclusion Good anal sex is all about communication, patience, and having a great anal care routine. There’s no shame in exploring what feels good. There is no best lube for anal or best position for anal as it is different for every individual. If you are looking for tools like BULBY Anal Douche Guide to spice up your anal play check out our anal toy collection here!
❓ What lube is best for anal?
For anal play, thick, long-lasting water-based or silicone-based lubricants are best. Silicone lubes provide extra slipperiness and last longer without drying out, but water-based lubes are easier to clean and toy-compatible. At Honey Play Box, we recommend trying our premium silicone lubes for a smooth, comfortable experience.
❓ How to relax before anal sex?
Relaxation is key! Start with gentle communication and trust-building with your partner. Engage in slow, deep breathing and take your time with foreplay, including external massage and plenty of lubrication. Using smaller toys like beginner plugs (gradually increasing size) can also help your muscles adjust comfortably.
❓ Are beginner plugs safe?
Yes! Beginner anal plugs are designed with safety in mind — they have smooth surfaces, tapered shapes, and flared bases to prevent slipping inside. Always choose body-safe materials like silicone, use plenty of lube, and clean them thoroughly before and after use. Honey Play Box offers a great selection of beginner-friendly plugs perfect for new explorers.
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