Here’s an open secret: Sex doesn’t start with penetration.
In fact, it starts way beyond getting naked in bed.
It begins with an exchange of a heated gaze, a small lick of your bottom lip, a feathery touch of your hand against their thigh and maybe, if you’re feeling frisky – you might even travel up, up, up until you land on the place of worship: a woman’s vagina.
There are so many ways to please a woman before you pop the filthy question of: “Can we fuck?”
We’re starting off with something we often take for granted – the brain. Glamour says that this is central to your partner’s mood which means even without physical contact, you need to be aware of your partner's mental state – if they’re tired or not, and use the right approach to turn them on. For example, this is where dirty talk comes into play. Use it wrong, it’s a turn off. Use it right, it directly influences how wet your partner gets.
Moving on right to the brain’s next-door neighbor! If you’ve ever felt relief from pulling your hair when stressed, then the same thing could happen when it comes to sex! You see, hair pulling acts as this sort of release from whatever overwhelms you at the moment. So when you pull at it while fucking your partner from behind, you’re actually encouraging your partner to relieve the tension and open her up to the pleasure!
I always refer back to movies because they’re right about a lot of things, especially about how kissing is the gateway to making love.
Just one touch is enough to electrify your woman’s body from the tips of her fingers to the ends of her toes.
Experiment with the pace – from soft to hard, from rough to gentle, and create a pattern that is unique to the both of you! It makes it extra special to have something that is solely yours to use.
The ears may not be as common as the lips, but you can definitely use this to turn your partner on. When you’re traveling past the lips, make sure to spend some time with her earlobe. Give it a light bite or suck and you’re sure to send a shiver straight to the pit of her stomach. The kind that tingles oh-so good.
I believe the neck is as famous as the lips! If you’re looking for a spot where you can turn her own while hearing her moan – and gives you enough space to use your hands someplace else, then the neck is the best place to rain your touch over!
Make sure to ghost your lips across the length of her neck. Then, apply more pressure for each round until your sucking marks into the skin there. The way you build up on the neck will also build up on your partner’s anticipation for what’s to come!
Just like the neck, the breasts require some warming up too. Oftentimes, when you grab them too rough, too soon, it won’t feel good. Instead, it’ll be painful and ruin your partner’s mood.
So, don’t get impatient! Take one massage at a time. Start slowly and touch every inch of her soft mounds. Work your way from the outside-in and once you get to the nipples, use a fingertip to swirl circles around it. Then, once you notice her wanting more, that’s when you amp it up and grab the breasts harder and pinch the nipples.
But not everyone is a fan of rough handling so make sure to communicate with your partner, get to an intensity you both like and stay there! We don’t want anyone getting hurt over here.
Allow me to get back on my movie-junkieness. Remember in romantic films where the man kisses a woman’s wrist while looking straight into her eyes? Do you also remember how the woman reacts as if that kiss alone was enough to make her melt?
That’s exactly the reason why you shouldn’t skip the wrist as an erogenous zone! Make sure to find the pulse and kiss there. Try to stay for longer than necessary and show her how even in the way blood pumps through her veins, you love it. That is a surefire way to intensify her arousal.
8. Inner Thighs
Just like the wrist, the same thing happens in the inner thigh.
If I may, this is a personal favorite of mine because imagine yourself kissing up, up, up her thigh and the closer you get to her vagina, the more excited she gets because you're so close to the coveted treasure!
So, if you find yourself in between her delicious thighs, don’t ignore them! Tease her for as long as you can resist and just when she thinks you’re diving in, do it on the other side. Trust me, it will rile her up to the point that the first contact of your mouth on her pussy is going to make her scream.
Feet are like the wrists, but for her lower body. You can have this as your starting point for the electrifying journey your hands will take across her legs. Don’t be afraid to run it up and down several times because the friction it causes sends her body blazing hot in the best way.
As if we could forget the largest part of the body – the back! It’s a lot of open space which means there are a ton of opportunities to either: give a massage for relief, place small marks so she could wake up and a have a firm reminder of the fun you two had the night before, or a place to hold when you fuck into her. I especially like the last one because being held by strong arms allows me to let it all go and give my partner full reign to pleasure me.
You’ve probably noticed by now that there are a lot of erogenous zones in a woman. You might even get excited to test them all out! But don’t forget the vulva!
Despite this being the mound that protects that famous duo of the g-spot and clitoris, this is also the perfect place to press your hand against. The pressure applied will give a different kind of sensation to the more sensitive areas of her vagina and prepare it for the pleasure storm it’s about to receive.
Oh, and a side note: You can use more than just your hands and fingers. You can use the tip of your penis first and try out the “just the tip” fantasy.
Last but definitely not the least, the clitoris is well-known for many reasons – most especially in taking your partner to the high heavens of pleasure.
And because it’s such a coveted spot, you also have to treat this with extreme care and attention.
Start with feather-light touches and gradually work up to a soft grinding sensation. You’ll feel it swell and get more sensitive the better you work it, which also helps to lubricate the area for penetration later on too!
We’re not done yet because you might think the butt is simply made for sitting. On the contrary, the butt is such a fun place to be! You can squeeze it, slap it, bounce it and eat it and it’s bubbly nature creates that tempting sensation like you just don’t wanna let go.
Also, who doesn’t like getting their ass touched with so much love and erotica?
If you can eat out the pussy, then you most certainly can eat out the anus because it has a similar amount of nerve ending that one touch can send her clenching for more. Treat this as delicate as her pussy and when it’s prepped and ready, eat it with consistent tongue stroke or mouth sucks. You’ll thank us later.
Step to the Next Fiery Level with Toys
If you want to take it up a notch with any of these erogenous zones of the body, you can definitely do so with sex toys.
If you want my recommendations, you can use the following:
This rotating head g-spot vibrator and clit licker is the multitasker you need! You can have Joi work your partner’s clit and vulva while you handle the rest of her beautiful body with your two hands.
You can use this small but very effective vibrator to press against your partner’s clit with one hand while you worship her breasts with another. Stimulating both of these areas will make her forget all her doubts at that moment and give in to the ocean of pleasure.
This versatile collection allows you to test a variety of combinations with a clitoris or g-spot detachable head – giving you every opportunity to explore the many ways you can please your woman.
The best part? You can use these interchangeable heads in any of her erogenous zones!
Don’t allow yourself to stick to just one pleasure spot for your partner as it may increase your chances of leading a stale sex life.
Don’t be afraid to explore, the magic is in the trial and error and the prize is a sex style that you’ll never get tired of!
So, take all the time to get down and dirty and surprise yourself with new and exciting positions!