Prostate Massage: What Is It & How to Do It

Prostate Massage

If there is one interesting toy out there today, it's a prostate massager. We can talk all day about vibrators, dildos, or butt plugs. Yet, this one in particular is one of the more underrated and underappreciated tools to use in sex.

This guide will explain what a prostate massager is. You will also learn how to use it on your partner. One thing to do before using this or any other toy is to bring up the idea to your partner.

They want to be able to anticipate the excitement of using toys. Whether they are using it or having one used on them, communication is important. The element of surprise might not be as good as people think.

With that said, let's dive in and discuss more about prostate massagers and how useful they can be.

What is a prostate massager

What is a prostate massager?

A prostate massager is a sex toy that is used anally. The purpose of this is to stimulate the prostate gland. This gland is the size of a walnut and is located two inches up the anal canal (specifically the anterior wall).

 So now that you know what it is and where it's located, let's continue. Prostate massagers come in different shapes, sizes, and materials. One of the great features to have is a vibration mode, which will pile up the stimulation.

There are also others that are specifically designed to help stimulate the perineum. This can be found between the anus and the scrotum. Since a prostate massager is an anal sex toy, you'll need to find one with a flared base.

In fact, we recommend a flared base for any anal sex toy. The reason being is that it will not slip inside the anus and get stuck. The flared base will be enough of a guiding tool if anything.


How to use a prostate massager: Tips to consider

Now, we get to the main event. A prostate massager will work great on a partner. It's important that you follow these steps below so you can do this properly each time.

There's a right way and a wrong way to use a prostate massager. Especially when you are prepping for it. Let's begin with these tips down below:

Make sure you and your partner are clean

We're not just talking about STDs and STIs (although you want to make sure you both are free of that). We're talking about general cleanliness. Good hygiene can play a positive role for sex.

Not only that, doing so will reduce the spread of STIs and bacteria. For good measure, take a warm bath or shower prior to using a prostate massager. It should also be a good idea to wash your prostate massager before and after each use.

Get as comfortable as possible

If there is one step you don't want to skip (aside from the previous one), it's making sure you or your partner is comfortable. You need to make sure the muscles located inside and around the anus are relaxed. Set the atmosphere if you have to.

This can include lighting candles, turning on relaxing music, or anything else that might help. If you are giving your partner a prostate massage, it's important to include foreplay. Spend as much time on it as you can.

If you're the one getting the massage, make sure you're in the best position possible to give your partner easy access. If you're unsure, lying face down on your stomach will be a good position to start with. On your back with the knees up can be a good alternate position.

Use lube - and lots of it

If you have done anal play before, this is obviously one of the biggest rules of them all. You'll want to use plenty of lube. Know what kind works best for you and your partner.

During the prostate massage, make sure you have it close by. There's a good chance that you will need to reapply more of it. Without lubrication (albeit the proper amount), this can lead to the tearing of sensitive tissues located inside the anus.

Use a finger first

Indeed, a finger can be useful before the massager is introduced. This will help ease things up. Again, use a great deal of lube.

Use gloves if you wish. But if you don't plan on it, make sure your nails are nice and trimmed. You want to slide at least one finger and let it sit there.

Two fingers can be fine as well. After your partner is comfortable, slide the finger(s) deeper until you start to feel a bump. This bump will be located three inches inside the anus.

From there, rub your finger(s) lightly with the fingertips going towards the base of the penis. This is the same 'come hither' motion for when you are stimulating a G-Spot (if you've ever done this before).

I welcome you to check out the guide to fingering techniques sex educator Auntie Vice wrote - it is definitely going to shed more light on the topic.

Use a prostate massager

At this point, you should have a prostate massager handy. If not, choose one that will be best for your partner's personal needs. Once it's in your hand, you can then put it to good use.

One of the best ways to use it is by using different vibration settings (if there are any). See which one your partner likes the best. However, some prostate massagers will not have this.

This means you will need to do the work manually. Either way, you can use varied strokes to see which will make your partner a lot more comfortable (and satisfied).

Visit our prostate massager category but the one that got my (prostate) heart is Quinn.

Final Thoughts

If you are considering a prostate massager, finding one with the perfect size, design, and features is key. Your partner's pleasure is important. Putting one to good use will give them an experience that is unforgettable.

Remember, making them as comfortable as possible is key. Also, make sure it's lubed up a lot. The last thing you need is to deal with any missteps.

Otherwise, use this guide as a reference. Before you know it, your partner might be begging for you to use this awesome toy every time you're both in the bedroom.

Honeyland Author

An engineer with a huge love for sex toys & tacos. Relentlessly working to change the sex space to be more user-friendly, educational & inclusive. Together with his wife Leja, Luka is a creator of several notable things which include an educational sex blog - Spices of Lust, the first ADA-ready and fully illustrated sex shop - The Sex Shed, and a brand of fantasy toys - Raw Love Studio. When he isn't surrounded by sex toys, he usually spends his time riding a bike, hiking, or cooking.